Being single for… well let’s just leave it at a while. I thought it would be fun to add a dating section to my blog so I could share some of my experiences, advice and thoughts on the topic. I have a ton of ideas to share about dating like the benefits of singlehood, how to meet someone, what to ask on a first date and how to determine if the person is a fit for you. There will definitely be more to come on those topics but do let me know in the comments or messages if there’s anything you want me to write about. As for today, I am focusing on where I’m at currently in dating and how I’m staying sane dating in 2021.
I’m actually on a bit of a dating hiatus right now which I started right before the holidays. To be honest sometimes this happens to me accidentally but right now I’m making the conscious choice not to see anyone and take some time off from dating. When I first got back to Jersey I had a lot going on in the dating department. It was fun for a while but at a certain point it stopped being fun and felt like work. As much as I want to meet the right person and settle down I don’t want to burn myself out in the process of “trying” to find them. I have my whole life to be married. I only have this short time right now to be single. I haven’t decided how long this hiatus is going to last but for now I’m enjoying the free time and extra energy I have to put towards myself.
I can’t overstress the importance of having single friends! If you find that you are the only one flying solo in your friend group it’s time to get new friends. Ha, only kidding, well kind of. You can keep the “in a relationship friends” but make sure you put some effort in to find friends who are single. The reason is quite simple, they can relate to you and what you’re going through. Your “relationship friends” can be sympathetic towards your struggle but your single friends are empathetic because they are down in the dating app trenches with you, dodging gaslighters, momma’s boys and commitment phobes. They are the ones who understand the struggle of fueling a conversation in an app with a complete stranger or meeting someone for a first date only to discover they’ve catfished you in one sense or another. If I have to bet your “relationship friends” are a bit rusty so their advice should be taken lightly but your single friends, that’s where the latest and greatest info is at so ask away. Dating during a pandemic is hard enough, at least get some cool single friends to be down in the trenches with you.
Questions About Your Dating Life
I (as I’m sure others can relate) have a few family members who ask me about the status of my dating life. I know their intentions aren’t bad but to be honest this question used to make me feel really bad because it only adds pressure in a seemingly impossible dating world. After getting this quite a bit I formed my new favorite response to these pestering questions- “I’m just enjoying being single and having fun”. It’s a polite way to deflect the question and focus more on the positive aspect of singlehood. The reality is once there is an update in this aspect of life these people will know about it but until then I feel better answering them in a confident and comfortable way that continues the conversation to all the other positive aspects I have going on in life.